If you currently own or have ever owned a second-gen Cummins, chances are you fall under one of these categories. I myself fall under the “I’m gonna restore it guy”, “too much fuel kid”, and the “14 wides” categories. So you can say I may be the worst of them all.
I tried ranking these in reverse order of worst to best.
Share this article with a friend. They are sure to hate you even more afterward.
#1: 14 wides
If you could afford 16 wides, you probably would not still be skating on 14’s. Somehow you have taken a sweet truck into meme territory; That is impressive. I know you do not have a truck payment, but I do know you have a payment on those sweet wheels.
#2: Too much fuel kid
Oh, the beloved Ppump – I am sure at some point you went a little too wild on that fuel plate. I just hope you have grown out of this phase already… For those who have a 24 valve, I hope you didn’t only buy a tuner to do this crap. Imagine spending money for a negative performance impact.
I know the picture may look like a Cummins… In reality, it is a 2nd gen with a v10. Many people think you’re compensating for small feet with that cobbled-together lift kit. Really you’re just compensating for having a gas engine with a hood stack. You’re not fooling anyone.
#4: The guy who actually tows
The only reason we know about this guy is because he makes sure to tell us; any moment he can.
He will even make sure to send us pictures any time he hooks a trailer up. Look guy, we are not mad at you. We know you’re always rolling the dice with D.O.T. Just stop filling my Instagram feed full of your clapped-out 24V and a lawn mower.
#5: I’m gonna restore it guy
You’ll never get to it. Just accept this now, and focus on finding a girlfriend.
The beloved grandpa truck. Please stop selling these to 16-year-olds with daddy’s money just so they can slap compound turbos on a stock short block. Their U-joints really despise you!
Soon enough, the grandpa truck will not exist. Just like that one day your parents never picked you up again. The last grandpa truck will be sold and we won’t even realize.